


A Trial Run

by twinillyrium



Category: A Court of Thorns and Roses Series - Sarah J. Maas
Genre: F/M, I just also like writing dialogue, It's their first time after all, Mating Bond, My First Fanfic, POV Feyre Archeron, Romance, Rough Kissing, Rough Sex, Rough but not that rough, Starfall, There is smut I promise, Wings, acomaf
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-03
Updated: 2019-08-03
Packaged: 2020-07-30 14:51:05
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,058
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20098981
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/twinillyrium/pseuds/twinillyrium
Summary: What if Rhysand had told Feyre about the mating bond on Starfall? Would she have accepted? A re-imagining of that night if it had played out differently...





	A Trial Run

_ Starfall, chapter 48 _ \---

His eyes fell on my mouth. “I’m wishing I could take back that kiss Under the Mountain.”

I sometimes forgot that kiss, when he’d done it to keep Aramantha from knowing that Tamlin and I had been in the forgotten hall, tangled up together. Rhysand’s kiss had been brutal, demanding, and yet… “Why?”

His gaze settled on the hand I’d painted instead, as if it were easier to face. “Because I didn’t make it pleasant for you, and I was jealous and pissed off, and I knew you hated me.”

Dangerous territory, I warned myself.

No. Honesty, that’s what it was. Honesty, and trust. I’d never had that with anyone.

Rhys looked up, meeting my gaze. And whatever was on my face -- I think it might have been mirrored on his: the hunger and longing and surprise.

***

“Feyre,” Rhys said suddenly, his eyes still on mine. He let go of my hand, and took a cautious step back. The temperature on the balcony seemed to go colder in an instant. 

I looked at him, wondering why he had moved away, but noticing the change in his tone. Rhys hesitated. I wondered what I had done in the last ten seconds to ruin the moment. 

“Feyre, there is something I need to tell you.” 

“What is it?” I said too quickly, trying not to sound alarmed.

Rhys only stared at me, his expression showing that he was desperately searching for the right words in his head. None came for several heartbeats. With a frustrated breath he hung his head and shuffled his feet once. 

“Just say it, I’m just going to say it --” he muttered to himself, but loud enough for my enhanced hearing to pick up. Then he met my eyes with renewed resolve.

“Feyre, I am your mate.” 

It took a moment for me to place the term that was still new to me. Mate. I repeated it in my head again. It didn’t compute. “What?” I said, but I had not misheard him. “I mean -- are you sure?” I amended lamely.

“Yes,” he said, taking a step towards me. He stopped outside of my personal space and did not make a move to come further. “I’ve known since the day we met, at Calanmai. I had hoped you would figure it out, if we spent enough time together. But with Starfall and you here with me... ” he ran a hand through his hair -- “You have a right to know. You have a right to know and a right to make your own decision.”

My brain struggled to keep up, only more questions spilling from my mind and out of my mouth. “Decision? What decision?”

Rhys looked away for a moment. “To decide if you -- accept. The mating bond. It means that you would become my partner for -- for the foreseeable future.” 

I sensed that he had meant to say “forever” but decided against it. But even “foreseeable future” caused my breathing to become irregular.

Rhys saw my hesitation. He reached out a hand, perhaps to touch my cheek, but stopped himself short. He stuffed both his hands in his pockets, maintaining his position a step away from me. He watched me closely, but did not speak further. Waiting for my reply. 

Mate. My mate. Slowly, my mind began to catch up to what I had been experiencing these past few months. How the bond between us always seemed to pulled taut -- a tug beckoning me to move closer to him, and the slack disappearing when I did. How his scent, his power, his presence, had felt more like a comfort than a threat for weeks now. How it felt to be near his shirtless or naked body -- something lurking deeper than lust or attraction. 

My face flushed at the memories -- the most recent being just days ago, at the Court of Nightmares. “Can we -- try it out? Before I accept the bond for the ‘foreseeable future’?”

Rhys, still looking at me with those damned violet eyes, let a warm smile creep onto his face. “‘Try it out’? Whatever do you mean, Feyre, darling. Please be specific.” 

I let out a breath I didn’t know I was holding. This, the teasing, I could deal with. I would take cocky, flirty Rhys over the flustered and uncertain one any day.

“Sex.” I said, my confidence unexpectedly matching his. If I was going to get through this, I needed a little bit of bravery. And I would be lying to myself if I thought that I hadn’t been thinking about it when I was in his lap, or earlier this very evening. 

“Oh Feyre, I thought you’d never ask.” He purred, finally closing the space between us. He touched my face, where the green dust still buzzed against my skin. He looked at me for a long moment. “May I kiss you, Feyre Archeron?”

I smiled at him again, letting my nervousness and excitement and the lunacy of this situation shine through. I tilted my head up to meet his lips in answer. 

It was soft, gentle. With neither of us talking, it was quiet, but the thrumming of my heart drowned out the chatter of the party guests below. His kiss was warm, and safe, and it felt _ right _. I relaxed into his arms, pressing myself closer to him. For the first time in weeks I gave myself over to my feelings for Rhys. Maybe he was right about this whole “mate” situation after all. Maybe this was the Cauldron’s plan all along. 

I slipped my tongue into his mouth to taste more of him. The taste was -- bitterly sour, and it stung. Like I had taken a bite of a foreign fruit that was both searingly hot and underripe. Unable to help myself, I pulled away from him in disgust.

“Get a taste of that star-spirit?” he said, laughing. Sure enough, the green dust had been smeared over his lips during what had certainly started as a tender, well-intentioned kiss. 

Mortified, I turned away and attempted to discreetly spit the dust out of my mouth. When that failed, I grabbed his wrist and wiped my mouth on the sleeve of his jacket. 

Rhys laughed openly as I struggled, the sound vibrating off of the stonework of the balcony. “I think that should count as our first kiss,” he said. He looked just as ridiculous as I must have, and yet his beaming smile undermined my attempt at a snappy comeback.

I scowled at him, and spit on the ground again.

“And here I was worried you’d look at me differently,” he said, mocking my frown. 

“Nope, I think my feelings when it comes to you are still pretty much the same.” I meant it as a jab, but seeing as I’d recently agreed to have sex with him, that line may have betrayed my carefully disguised behavior towards him over the past weeks.

Rhys reached towards me again, wiping away dust from my lips with his thumb. I leaned into his touch. “I don’t know about you, Feyre, but every moment without you in my bed is agony,” Rhys said shortly. 

It always astounded me that he had the nerve to say these things out loud. I guess it had gotten him this far with relative success. “Okay,” I said stupidly. “Where -- where shall we go?”

“The townhouse is closest. The gang will probably sleep in the House of Wind once the party dies down. There are other, more private places we could go, but with my magic under surveillance I’m afraid they would require a long journey. So, my vote is for the townhouse. May I give you a ride?” He smirked, extending a hand to me. 

Raising my eyebrows, I accepted his hand. A moment later he shot us into the air, soaring among the stars in the dazzling night’s sky. 

****

We arrived at the townhouse, Rhys landing us smoothly onto the rooftop garden. The cool night’s breeze had been amplified to frigid while we were in the air, and I was openly shivering. As Rhys had promised, the house was empty. I shuffled inside to get warm. 

My nerves had been tightening at a dangerous rate during the flight up where we hardly spoke at all. That silence had been a bad idea. My mind was filing through each thing that could go wrong, and each reason not to go through with this. But I had seen the look on his face as he doubted himself, just before he confessed to me one of his greatest secrets. He trusted me with so much. I had to see this through. Even if it was only once. 

I stepped away from him, immediately wondering where to start walking. His room? Mine? Some convenient soundproofed hideaway to spare me the embarrassment of potential eavesdroppers?

Rhys saved me by saying “I thought you might want to change into more comfortable clothing. I’m going to.” 

I looked down at my stunning, shimmering gown. “What, you don’t like my dress anymore?”

Rhys snorted, shaking his head. “Feyre, to be completely honest, if you wear that in my bedroom I’ll shred it clean open. And that dress in particular means a great deal to me. Please change, for the sake of preserving a priceless piece of fashion.”

I tried to think of a smart retort but the reality of this situation refused to stop presenting itself in his words. So I stuck with, “Fine. And where will I meet you after?”

“My bedroom, if you would honor me. I believe you know where it is.”

My cheeks flushed again, remembering when I’d waded through billowing night and mist to spare him from a nightmare -- only to find him nude in his bed. I turned away with a curt nod. I began walking to my bedroom, trying to sway my hips a bit more than was natural. I felt his eyes on me until I passed out of his view.

I was startled to find Cerridwen and Nuala in my room when I opened the door. I assumed Rhys had sent for them in whatever way he communicated with his staff. 

“Don’t worry, we won’t stay long,” Cerridwen said, hiding a smile. I opened my mouth but decided not to risk saying anything that would allude to why Rhys and I had returned alone. I wondered if they already knew about the mating bond, like they seemed to know about everything else. 

They released the combs fastened to my head and it immediately felt lighter, which may not have been a good thing in my current state. Then, they began the dual effort of releasing me from the thousand buttons on my glorious dress. Rhys was right, as always -- this would have been a hellish thing to try to get me out of without damaging it.

All at once I realized that I would be naked, very soon, in front of Rhysand, _ High Lord of the Night Court _ , in his _ bedroom _ . My heart began beating quickly again as I tried to focus on my breathing. _ Be brave, be brave _, I thought to myself. Yes, this would indeed require a fair bit of bravery. 

Nuala and Cerridwen at last released me from my gown and had already selected by favorite pair of sleep pajamas from the dresser. Definitely more comfortable. I slipped the silky top over my head, and seconds later I heard my door shut behind me as they exited.

For perhaps minutes, I stared at myself in the mirror. I looked the same. Healthy. Nervous. I looked at my stomach, exposed by the sleeping clothes I liked so much. The body that Rhys had helped me restore with compassion, patience, and love. Love? Could that be the right word? 

Before I let my mind walk further down that dangerous path, I willed my feet to start moving in the direction of Rhys’s room. But I went slowly, still categorizing the million thoughts threatening to change my mind. 

I arrived at his door, and my focus sharpened. I hesitated only a moment, then swung it open without knocking. Adrenaline made manners secondary, I supposed. 

The lights of his room were dimmed, and several candles had been lit and placed on various surfaces. He even had an expensive looking bottle of wine uncorked and waiting nearby, with two glasses. Did he always keep fancy wine and candles in his room? It was funny to think about Rhys fretting about making his room presentable for me.

Rhys was standing by his bureau, and looked over, surprised.

“Sorry,” was all I said. “I should have knocked.”

“By all means, please come barging in. Maybe soon this will be your room too.”

Right. ‘_Partner for the foreseeable future _’. But I wondered -- “How does it work? How does accepting the bond work?”

“You’d need to cook and serve me food, as odd as that sounds. And since I don’t have a hot stove down here, I don’t think we’ll run the risk of you accepting the bond by mistake tonight. Tonight is a trial run, as you suggested. All other formalities can be tomorrow’s concern.” 

“Right,” I said, lamely. I was never very good at this. Those minutes before sex, when it was presumed to happen by both parties. I shut my eyes, and blocked his name from my mind before I thought back on my most recent experiences in this arena.

When I opened my eyes, Rhys was standing in front of me. He too was wearing silken sleeping clothes. 

“One thought in exchange for another?” he prompted.

I released a breath and said, “I want to do this. I really do. But I’m nervous because it’s you and you’re my _ mate _ and this is insane?” It came out as a question even though I had no doubt any of it was true. 

Rhys smiled and took my head in his hands. I melted into his warm touch, and looked up at him.

“We’ll go slow. At any point, if you want to stop, just say so and we will, no questions asked. I care about you very much, Feyre. I know this is a completely crazy situation but personally I’m elated it’s gone this well so far,” he added with a sheepish smile. “This activity with a mating bond in the mix is new to both of us.” 

“That was multiple thoughts,” I said. But his words comforted me. This was Rhys, after all. I was always safe with Rhys.

“We seem to have a habit of getting carried away with those.”

“Then no more talking,” I said, reaching for his face. The delight in his eyes was priceless as I smoothly pulled his head down for our second kiss that night.

His hands moved from my face to my hips and he pulled me flush against him. His hands slipped beneath my short sleeping shirt and began tracing circles along my bare back. His touch was like fire as his fingers roamed. 

The kiss began chaste, but grew deeper with each passing moment. I wondered if my knees would give out. I thought back to that day during training, when he had held me against his sculpted chest. My hands found the hem of his shirt and began pulling up. I didn’t have much hope of doing this myself with his wings involved. How did he manage to put on a shirt? 

He released me from our kiss, and raised his eyebrows in a coy expression. Nonetheless, he helped me pull his shirt over his head, slats opening around his wings. When it was off, my hands began exploring their way from his upper arms to his back, briefly grazing where his wings met his shoulder blades. Rhys sucked in a breath. I moved my hands down the hard planes of his chest to his stomach. Chancing a look down, I saw something straining against his pants.

Part of me was terrified, but another, louder part of me was emboldened by the sight. So I touched one of his hands on my waist and began moving it up, in a silent command to rid me of my shirt as well. 

He did as I instructed, promptly moving it over my head. He tossed it aside without a second thought. His eyes conveyed pure hunger as he took me in. This was escalating quickly.

He kissed me again, his lips crushing into mine as his hand traveled from my navel to by breasts. I tried to stop myself from groaning into his mouth. He moved his lips to my ear, nipping at an earlobe before speaking. 

“How do you like it, Feyre.” His voice was deep as his hands palmed my breasts. Something inside me was throbbing. 

“Rough.” It came out as a grunt, but when he pulled back, his answering grin told me he had heard me. I wondered if my eyes were as dark as his. 

“I thought so.” 

A heartbeat later, I was lifted up, and before I could fully grasp what was happening, I was thrown onto his bed. I let out a yelp of surprise that turned into a laugh. He crawled over me, slowly. Finally he settled with his fists on either side of me, careful to keep our bodies apart. That raw hunger in his eyes was a painting I’d make someday. 

His lips dove to my neck -- kissing and sucking and teeth scraping. I arched my neck to give him access as my hands roamed from his back down to his ass. His wings flared out above us. 

Without fanfare, he reached a hand down the front of my pants. The time for teasing was over. I moaned loudly at the touch, not caring who was in earshot of this house. He must have felt the substantial wetness there as a low sound rumbled out of his chest. When he pulled away, his eyes looked different -- alien, almost feral, with an intensity I’d never seen before. They were back to violet in an instant. 

“May I?” he rasped with a cool breath, as he tugged at the band of my pants. 

“Yes,” was all I managed to get out. 

Withdrawing momentarily, he swiftly pulled my pants and underwear down from my body, leaving me bare before him. I was breathing hard when he climbed back over me, letting me feel his hardness against my thigh. 

His hand reached for my center again, and he held my gaze as he slipped a long finger inside me. I tensed as my mind fixated on the feeling. He began moving his hand as I let out an undignified whine. I arched into him, unabashedly grinding on his hand. I was panting hard, one fist in the sheets and another on the back of his head as I tried to force him close to me again.

He obliged by once again going after my neck and jaw with his talented mouth. He was unconsciously moving his hips in time with his hand surely in an attempt to make me go mad. As my breathing grew ragged, as that throbbing inside me threatened to spill over, he withdrew his fingers.

My eyes scrunched shut as I let out a loud groan of frustration. 

“The main event...” he said, also breathing hard. I tried to shoot him a nasty glare but he only laughed at my expression. He kicked off his pants and underwear. In one motion, he nudged my legs apart and settled between them. 

Some of my focus returned. This was it. There was no undoing this. _ Be brave, be brave _ . So I relocated my hands to his shoulders and looked deeply into his eyes. _ I’m ready _, I said down the bond. 

He pushed slowly, rocking back and forth to ease in. The stretch was wonderful and I spread my legs wider to accommodate more, my body writhing under him. I moaned at the feeling as he let out a low growl, trying to maintain his careful composure. When he was fully seated inside, he stilled. 

That’s when I felt it. The bond -- impossibly tight between us, refusing to let us separate by even an inch. I let out a gasp, and his answering intake of breath let me know he had felt it too. The mating bond was real, so very very real inside of us.

Unable to stand another second like this I gripped the backs of his thighs and pulled hard. “_ Move _,” I commanded, my eyes holding his. 

With a wicked smile, he did as I asked. His thrusts began slow. _ More more more, _ I said down the bond, probably shouting. Again, he obliged. His thrusts came with quick snaps of his hips, driving deep inside of me and pushing me a little bit further up the bed with each one. _ Yes yes yes. _I locked my legs around his thighs, my feet brushing his wings. He inhaled unevenly but did not stop. I reached for his ass again, pulling it towards me in time with his thrusts, urging him to go faster.

It was fast, and hard, and incredible. He brought his face close to mine and laid a bruising kiss on my mouth, biting my lip. The flash of pain put me so close to the edge. As if he could sense it, he slid a hand between us and touched me where I needed it most. He traced circles around my sensitive flesh, before finally pushing down hard with his thumb. My entire body clenched as my orgasm crashed through me, and I moaned desperately into him, screwing my eyes shut. Letting out a sharp breath, Rhys nearly collapsed on top of me as his release found him seconds later. 

He hovered over me as we both fought for air, still shaking. After a long moment I looked up at him, and saw wonder in his eyes. All the stars of the universe shining inside them. The look caused me to blink back tears.

Wordlessly he withdrew at last, and I let out a sigh at the loss of contact. He rolled over next to me, both of us staring at the white ceiling. I lay there, thoroughly fucked, not wanting to move. Bathing in the afterglow. 

I didn’t want to speak first. Mainly, I didn’t know what to say. And surely Rhys would have some snide comment ready to christen the moment. 

“I love you,” he said suddenly, not looking at me. 

I froze, and snapped my head right to look at him. 

“I know it’s not preferred to say it right after sex, but it’s true, Feyre. I love you. Deeply. I have for quite some time.” He still wasn’t looking at me. 

Words failed me. I searched my mind for a response and found nothing. So instead I searched my heart. Those moments between us pushed their way to the forefront of my mind -- the jealousy, the desire, the unyielding respect he showed towards me day after day. 

“I love you too,” I said softly, surprised by my own voice. “And I… I think...” I took a steadying breath and started again -- “I think I want to accept the mating bond.” 

He looked at me then, studying me closely, the stars somehow shining even brighter in his eyes. 

“Well then it looks like you’re stuck with me,” Rhys said, rolling over to gather me into his arms. I tangled my legs in his to pull him closer. 

“I guess I am,” I said, reaching up to touch his face. “Although I’m not sure if this counts as a fair trial run.”

“What? Why not?” he grinned.

“You picked me up and shoved me on the bed! It threw my whole game off!”

“Oh, my apologies. I didn’t mean to disrupt your ‘_ game _’,” he said sarcastically with a laugh. 

“You’ll see,” I said threateningly. “Next time it’ll be a fair fight.” 

“I can’t wait,” he said, and leaned in for a gentle kiss.

He pulled the covers of his bed over me and moved away for a moment to blow out the candles. He finally settled back in next to me, and we resumed our embrace. I drifted off to sleep in his arms, and dreamed of our fast-approaching forever. 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading!! This is my very first fanfic. I devoured the ACOTAR series earlier this year and couldn't get this story out of my head. It was the perfect time for Rhys to tell her about the bond -- not that I don't love the way it actually occurred. Any comments and feedback will be very appreciated! 
> 
> To all the ACOTAR fanfic writers -- thank you for your inspiration! You are all so talented and I've enjoyed a great deal of what you share here. KUDOS!


End file.
